Bellman joke
The Squirrel's Nest Extremities, Dirt & Various Repressed Emotions
Pandemonium (Killing Joke album) Dirty Jokes and Beer: Stories of the Unrefined
Practical joke device
Comedy in Bosnia and Herzegovina
The Killing Joke (novel)
The Aristocrats (film)Tenpenny Joke Care Bears: Journey to Joke-a-lot (soundtrack)
I Was Only Joking
Off-color humor
Photocopylore
Des MacHale
The Courtauld Talks
Friday, February 23, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Relationship
50 Most romantic things to do with your Girlfriend/Boyfriend
1. Watch the sunset together.2. Whisper to each other.3. Cook for each other.4. Walk in the rain. 5. Hold hands.6. Buy gifts for each other.7. Roses.8. Find out their favorite cologne/perfume and wear it every timeyou're together.9. Go for a long walk down the beach at midnight. 10. Write poetry for each other11. Hugs are the universal medicine.12. Say I love you, only when you mean it and make sure they know youmean it.13. Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry etc. 14. Tell her that she's the only girl you ever want. Do not lie.15. Spend every second possible together .16. Look into each other's eyes.17. Very lightly push up her chin, look into her eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.18. When in public, don't flirt with each other.19. Put love notes in their pockets when they aren't looking.20. Buy her a ring.21. Sing to each other. 22. Always hold her around her hips/sides.23. Take her to dinner and do the dinner for two deal.24. Spaghetti? (Ever see Lady and the Tramp?)25. Hold her hand, stare into her eyes, kiss her hand and then put it over your heart.26. Dance together.27. Let your girl fall asleep with her head in your lap.(It looks real cute)28. Do cute things like write I love you in a note so that they haveto look in a mirror to read it. 29. Make excuses to call them every 5 minutes30. Even if you are really busy doing something, go out of your way tocall and say I love you.31. Call from your vacation spot to tell them you were thinking about them.32. Remember your dreams and tell her about them.33. Always tell her how pretty she looks.34. Tell each other your most sacred secrets/fears.35. Be Prince Charming to her parents.(Brownie Points) 36. Brush her hair out of her face for her.37. Hang out with his/her friends. (more brownie points)38. Go to church/pray/worship together.39. Take her to see a romantic movie and remember the parts she liked. 40. Learn from each other and don't make the same mistake twice.41. Describe the joy you feel just to be with him/her.42. Make sacrifices for each other.43. Really love each other, or don't stay together. 44. Let there never be a second during any given day that you aren'tthinking about them, and make sure they know it.45. Love yourself before you love anyone else.46. Learn to say sweet things in foreign languages. 47. Dedicate songs to them on the radio.48. Fall asleep on the phone with each other.49. Stand up for them when someone talks trash.50. Never forget the kiss goodnight. And always remember to say, "Sweet dreams."
1. Watch the sunset together.2. Whisper to each other.3. Cook for each other.4. Walk in the rain. 5. Hold hands.6. Buy gifts for each other.7. Roses.8. Find out their favorite cologne/perfume and wear it every timeyou're together.9. Go for a long walk down the beach at midnight. 10. Write poetry for each other11. Hugs are the universal medicine.12. Say I love you, only when you mean it and make sure they know youmean it.13. Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry etc. 14. Tell her that she's the only girl you ever want. Do not lie.15. Spend every second possible together .16. Look into each other's eyes.17. Very lightly push up her chin, look into her eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.18. When in public, don't flirt with each other.19. Put love notes in their pockets when they aren't looking.20. Buy her a ring.21. Sing to each other. 22. Always hold her around her hips/sides.23. Take her to dinner and do the dinner for two deal.24. Spaghetti? (Ever see Lady and the Tramp?)25. Hold her hand, stare into her eyes, kiss her hand and then put it over your heart.26. Dance together.27. Let your girl fall asleep with her head in your lap.(It looks real cute)28. Do cute things like write I love you in a note so that they haveto look in a mirror to read it. 29. Make excuses to call them every 5 minutes30. Even if you are really busy doing something, go out of your way tocall and say I love you.31. Call from your vacation spot to tell them you were thinking about them.32. Remember your dreams and tell her about them.33. Always tell her how pretty she looks.34. Tell each other your most sacred secrets/fears.35. Be Prince Charming to her parents.(Brownie Points) 36. Brush her hair out of her face for her.37. Hang out with his/her friends. (more brownie points)38. Go to church/pray/worship together.39. Take her to see a romantic movie and remember the parts she liked. 40. Learn from each other and don't make the same mistake twice.41. Describe the joy you feel just to be with him/her.42. Make sacrifices for each other.43. Really love each other, or don't stay together. 44. Let there never be a second during any given day that you aren'tthinking about them, and make sure they know it.45. Love yourself before you love anyone else.46. Learn to say sweet things in foreign languages. 47. Dedicate songs to them on the radio.48. Fall asleep on the phone with each other.49. Stand up for them when someone talks trash.50. Never forget the kiss goodnight. And always remember to say, "Sweet dreams."
Monday, February 19, 2007
Love letter by Winston Churchill
January 23, 1935
My darling Clemmie, In your letter from Madras you wrote some words very dear to me, about my having enriched your life. I cannot tell you what pleasure this gave me, because I always feel so overwhelmingly in your debt, if there can be accounts in love.... What it has been to me to live all these years in your heart and companionship no phrases can convey.Time passes swiftly, but is it not joyous to see how great and growing is the treasure we have gathered together, amid the storms and stresses of so many eventful and to millions tragic and terribleyears?
Your loving husband(Winston Churchill)
My darling Clemmie, In your letter from Madras you wrote some words very dear to me, about my having enriched your life. I cannot tell you what pleasure this gave me, because I always feel so overwhelmingly in your debt, if there can be accounts in love.... What it has been to me to live all these years in your heart and companionship no phrases can convey.Time passes swiftly, but is it not joyous to see how great and growing is the treasure we have gathered together, amid the storms and stresses of so many eventful and to millions tragic and terribleyears?
Your loving husband(Winston Churchill)
Friday, February 16, 2007
Funny Quotes
Scientists are saying that in the future we will be able to have sex with robots. I tried that once. It was horrible. Right in the middle I had to call tech support. -- David Letterman
If you rest, you rust. -- Helen Hayes
When I was a kid I said to my Father one afternoon, "Will you take me to the zoo?" He answered, "If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you." -- Jerry Lewis
Why attack God? He may be as miserable as we are. -- Erik Satie
There is definitely life after oat bran. All our nation has to show after years of that is diarrhea. -- Julia Child
If you rest, you rust. -- Helen Hayes
When I was a kid I said to my Father one afternoon, "Will you take me to the zoo?" He answered, "If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you." -- Jerry Lewis
Why attack God? He may be as miserable as we are. -- Erik Satie
There is definitely life after oat bran. All our nation has to show after years of that is diarrhea. -- Julia Child
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Valentine Special
"Where love rules, there is no will to power; and where power predominates, there love is lacking. The one is the shadow of the other."~ Carl Jung
"Love is that splendid triggering of human vitality � the supreme activity which nature affords anyone for going out of himself toward someone else."~ Jos� Ortega y Gasset
"Love doesn�t just sit there, like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new."~ Ursula K Le Guin
"The opposite of love is not hate, it�s indifference."~ Elie Wiesel
"Falling in love is not an extension of one s limits or boundaries; it is a partial and temporary collapse of them."~ M Scott Peck
"The first duty of love is to listen."~ Paul Tillich
"In literature as in love, we are astonished at what is chosen by others."~ Andr� Maurois
"Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all."~ Harriet Van Horne
" Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in a light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it."~ Maurice Chevalier
"This is one of the miracles of love: It gives � a power of seeing through its own enchantments and yet not being disenchanted."~ C S Lewis
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."~ Mignon McLaughlin
"One advantage of marriage, it seems to me, is that when you fall out of love with him, or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you maybe fall in again."~ Judith Viorst
"To keep your marriage brimming,With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you�re wrong, admit it;
Whenever you�re right, shut up."
~ Ogden Nash
"A fastidious person in the throes of love is a rich source of mirth."~ Martha Duffy
"To see her is to love her,And love but her forever;
For Nature made her what she is,
And never made anither! "
~ Robert Burns
"I'm in the mood for love
Simply because you're near me.
Funny, but when you're near me
I'm in the mood for love."
~ Dorothy Fields
Thursday, February 8, 2007
New quotes
If you have it [love],you don't need to have anything else.If you don't have it,it doesn't matter much what else you do have.- Sir James M. Barrie
For one human being to love another that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate, the last test and proof; the work for which all other work is but preparation. ~ Rainer Maria Rilke
The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration. ~ Pearl S. Buck
Love works in miracles every day: such as weakening the strong, and stretching the weak; making fools of the wise, and wise men of fools; favouring the passions, destroying reason, and in a word, turning everything topsy-turvy. ~ Marguerite De Valois
For one human being to love another that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate, the last test and proof; the work for which all other work is but preparation. ~ Rainer Maria Rilke
The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration. ~ Pearl S. Buck
Love works in miracles every day: such as weakening the strong, and stretching the weak; making fools of the wise, and wise men of fools; favouring the passions, destroying reason, and in a word, turning everything topsy-turvy. ~ Marguerite De Valois
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
